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Phx115

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Reply with quote  #1 
DD10 learned a tough lesson yesterday: Classical ballet standards are stringent. However, I'm proud that she picked herself back up and went on to dance for four more hours at her studio.

The top ballet schools can afford to be super selective. I don't fault the schools that, AT ALL. They want to mold these 10-11 year olds into THEIR look.

Unfortunately, she wasn't accepted into NBS's summer program. It was tough because only 12 auditioned and they picked five. One girl accepted is going into 6th grade; the other four were accepted into the grade 5 summer program.

We knew the odds were against it, but it was one of the few times I've seen her cry and cry about anything dance. She's registered for RWB school's summer audition, but I'm debating on pulling her from it. I'm pretty certain the same result will happen there. Her turnout isn't going to increase in a week. Plus, this audition requires an overnight stay.

I'll let her choose, obviously, but my instinct to protect her from the disappointment is tough to ignore.
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joriebelle

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Reply with quote  #2 
I'm so sorry, Phx.  [frown]  It's so hard to see your own child cry.  She is very young yet, with plenty of time to work and be accepted into the program next year.  You'll have to let us know what she chooses to do about the audition next week.
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Mitzy

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Reply with quote  #3 
I'm sorry. There can be so much rejection in ballet, for even the most talented and suitable. To be honest, I think it is better to experience it early, as I have seen a few that didnt until later and I think it was harder for them. It can be a tough road, and this is only the very start. If your daughter really wants to pursue this, the best way to help her is to try to stay positive, I know it can be hard. I think RWB sends letters, and perhaps that would be easier.
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dmjrm4

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Reply with quote  #4 
Sorry for your DD and for your Mama's heart.  It stings.
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diglass

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Reply with quote  #5 
I'm so sorry. My DD went through this one year, I think she was 15. There are so many strange factors that equal an acceptance. My DD had attended the same SI  the summer before she was rejected. She was also accepted the following year. She will have to learn about rejection and she has to move on. I would not pull her from the  RWB audition. Auditions are about so much more than an acceptance or a rejection. These auditions are an experience in themselves. They get a chance to see other dancers who are following the same path. She will experience taking class from someone new and also get a chance to see if she really likes the style of RWB. She can attend auditions for programs she is interested in learning more about to see if she likes their style of training. Then you can decide if she wants to look into thoses programs in the future. My DD sometimes went to an audition just as a warm up. This way the program that was her top choice wasn't her first audition of the season. The more auditions she attends the more comfortable she will become with the process. PS. turn out isnt everything. My DD lacks some turn out on one side. She managed to hold her own in several SI programs. Best Wishes! 
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tappinmom

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Reply with quote  #6 
Unfortunately rejection is part of the performing arts.  If you don't fit the idea of what they are looking for that's it and it happens often.  I have a friend whose DD was accepted to NBS as a 10 year old for the summer and they raved about her facility.  She attended the following summer as well and they loved her.  When she auditioned for the year round program she was denied because they decided even though she had wonderful facility she was never going to be over 5 feet tall and that didn't fit with their vision.  It was hard for her.
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Angel2228

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Reply with quote  #7 
They are very specific on what they are looking for.
Have you thought of Alberta Ballet? Dd has friends who have gone to all three, rwb, nbs and school of Alberta ballet. They actually preferred RWB and Alberta ballet. The dance schedule was more intense at them. Dd was wait listed for rwb before. From what I heard, they sent out yes's then the no's and worked their way to the wait listed. It took a month!! Alberta ballet now emails and everything gets sent out same day a week later.
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heidi459

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Reply with quote  #8 
I guess I would just discourage you from encouraging her to give up.  As many have said, rejection is part and parcel of this process.  It's disappointing but now's a great time to learn that it's not the end.  And stopping her from auditioning for other programs?  IDK   It could in fact be construed as an indication that, yes, it does kind of mean 'the end'.

Also.. I know nothing about the Canadian SIs but, just in case, I'll offer that it's easy to get all fixated and make more out of the 'big name" programs than there is.  And it might be worth not falling into that trap. What you want is great training, period, and believe it or not great training can come from a variety of sources.  I tend to think of the 3 letter ballet schools in the US much like I think of the Ivies. It's less that they have some sort of secret formula than it is that they make sure to only allow the best of the best to walk through their doors.  Just food for thought perhaps.  Good luck!
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Phx115

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Reply with quote  #9 
Thanks everyone. I really appreciate the feedback. I think I was particularly thrown because she normally handles things without tears. Obviously, this somehow meant more to her than I anticipated.

I did sign her up for the Alberta audition, in addition to RWB and NBS, mostly because we have relatives in all three cities. I'm Canadian, and the auditions happen to fall on days when she wouldn't be missing her classes and rehearsals.

I agree, too, that I don't want her giving up, or for her to feel like I've given up on her. It probably does help that rejections/acceptances come through mail/email for the other two programs.

The other summer intensives, except for one, are local and do not require an audition. We opted out of putting together an audition video after it took 30 minutes to get first arabesque and tendu in second photos. LOL! Frankly, there'll be time for that down the road.
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jemn

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Reply with quote  #10 
I'm so sorry your DD had to go through this. I've heard wonderful things about the Oakville Ballet SI program. I know it's not the NBS, RWB, etc....but maybe an option for this year? 
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meatball77

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Reply with quote  #11 
Your job as a parent is not to protect your child from rejection.  If you do that then you're doing your child a huge disservice. 

Your job as a parent is to prepare your child for rejection (saying if instead of when, being realistic about their chances in competition) and to be a shoulder to cry on if they need it.

Failure is so important.  You learn and grow so much more from rejection than from easy accomplishments.  If she wants to audition then take her.  Just prepare her for the rejection if it happens.
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BCdancemom

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Reply with quote  #12 
Aw. It's tough to be told no. My daughter auditioned for RWB and was rejected. She was not happy, but it was good to go thru the process. She was accepted at Alberta ballet but we decided not to register. Their costs were just too high. This year she has been accepted in a local SI and didn't audition for RWB. I would encourage her to keep trying but to see the audition as a learning opportunity, and to learn what she needs to work on for next time [smile]
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cupcake3

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Reply with quote  #13 
Hi Phx115, I understand the disappointment as my 11yo daughter auditioned for NBS in Vancouver and was not selected. She also auditioned for RWB and was selected, so you just never know! This was her first year of auditions, I think both were a great experience. Good luck to your daughter!
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Phx115

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Reply with quote  #14 
Well, we were supposed to head out for the 3-hr drive tonight, but after 6 straight hours of rehearsal today DD got in the car and said her legs were sore and she "probably wouldn't get picked for RWB anyway" so we didn't go.

I didn't push because I figured if it meant that much to her, she would've wanted to go regardless of how she felt.

I guess we'll just look for strong programs locally.
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sk8jdgca

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Reply with quote  #15 
NBS summer program is an audition for the full year program. It is not a typical US summer intensive. They are very, very select. I hope you find a place for your daughter. If you want Toronto. Ballet Jorgensen has a nice SI program for your age child. There are no auditions for the younger dancers.
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