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nicknoralove

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Reply with quote  #1 
So, they started my daughter's jazz and tap group dances for comp. She's 5, she'll be 6 when we go to competition. 

I'm already freaking out a little. The formation for the jazz routine has one girl in the first line, two girls in the second, three in the third and so on. They put my daughter in the first. All by herself. Am I the only parent who doesn't really want their child front and center? 

It's not that I want her to be the best and am worried about whether they win. I don't care if they win, for my daughter it's all about performing, she loves being on stage. But that's the thing. She loves being on stage. She did really great at the recital, but she wasn't on a comp team last year and the teachers were in the front of the stage helping a bit. As you know at comp they can't do that. 

They offered her a solo this year and I was going to let her do it but after some thought, asked if she could do a duet instead, because I thought that would be a little less pressure. She gets very embarrassed if she forgets practicing at home. I think if she happened to forget a solo on stage (which could happen because she's so young), she might be so upset she won't want to go back on stage and it won't be fun for her anymore - which I feel that at age 6 that's what it should be. I don't want to ruin it for her. In a duet if one of the kids forgets momentarily they can look at the other one. Sure they won't be in synch but again this is really supposed to be for them to get to perform because they're only going to be 6. I'm not worried about how they score.

However now I have the same worry about this jazz routine. There is no one for her to look at if she happens to forget. I would honestly rather she not be in the front. Her dad (who I'm divorced from) thinks I'm crazy and not being supportive somehow. 

I mean, I won't say anything, but I'm secretly hoping they end up switching her spot and I feel a little terrible about this. 


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prancer

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Reply with quote  #2 
I’m sure the teachers put her there for a reason. And being able to remember choreo is a big part of the reason at that age. Good for her. Try to relax. Sounds like her teachers have faith in her!
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wvpointe

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Reply with quote  #3 
Just wanted to say no you are not the only parent to feel this way! I have had that sick to my stomach feeling for my daughter when "all eyes are on her". My mom brain is praying just let her be able to do it. It would kill her if she messed up right now. The secret is never to let your daughter know you feel anxious. It is so hard to do! Like Prancer said have trust in her teachers that they know what they are doing and have trust in her abilities (not just dance abilities, but her strength to be resilient if something did go wrong!)
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tappinmom

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Reply with quote  #4 
DS was pretty much almost always the only boy in his routines so he was always front and centre.  I worried about it constantly but also knew the DT wouldn't have put him there if he couldn't do it.  Have faith.
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momcrew

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Reply with quote  #5 
My daughters are often front and center simply because of their height. They've done fine. 
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my2miracles

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Reply with quote  #6 
She shouldn't be looking at anyone else for choreography anyway.  This is a great way for her not to get into that bad habit.  One wise older DT (60's) dd had when she was younger, yelled at her team and said "Don't be looking at the other dancers to make their mistake.  If you are going to make a mistake, at least let it be your own".  This was great advice for dd because she would know the choreography but doubt her self and then do the wrong stuff that the kid next to her was doing.

Plus have you seen the entire dance yet?  I'm guessing that they will move around so she won't always be in front. 
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nicknoralove

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Reply with quote  #7 
Quote:
Originally Posted by my2miracles
She shouldn't be looking at anyone else for choreography anyway.  This is a great way for her not to get into that bad habit.  One wise older DT (60's) dd had when she was younger, yelled at her team and said "Don't be looking at the other dancers to make their mistake.  If you are going to make a mistake, at least let it be your own".  This was great advice for dd because she would know the choreography but doubt her self and then do the wrong stuff that the kid next to her was doing. 


This is absolutely a great point. I wasn't so much thinking that she should watch other kids during the whole dance, but more if she did forget, there is someone to look at to remind her. But, this is a good thing to remember. 
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nicknoralove

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Reply with quote  #8 
Thanks everyone, you've made me feel a lot better. I do need to have faith that they'll do the right thing if she struggles and that I should have faith in her. 
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my2miracles

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Reply with quote  #9 
Quote:
Originally Posted by nicknoralove


This is absolutely a great point. I wasn't so much thinking that she should watch other kids during the whole dance, but more if she did forget, there is someone to look at to remind her. But, this is a good thing to remember. 


I wasn't implying that she would watch the whole time nor did my dd or anyone on her team.  The point the teacher was making is that even if you forget that doesn't mean the kid you look at knows it either.
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nicknoralove

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Reply with quote  #10 
Quote:
Originally Posted by my2miracles


I wasn't implying that she would watch the whole time nor did my dd or anyone on her team.  The point the teacher was making is that even if you forget that doesn't mean the kid you look at knows it either.


Oh I understood, I didn't take it that way at all. I think I was just thinking through it "out loud" here. And you're absolutely right. 
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ScottishDanceMum

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Reply with quote  #11 

Our teacher actually thought starting competing solos would be easier for Daughter.  That way, if she missed a step or forgot the choreography, no one would realise.  Her teacher said "just keep moving.  The judges wouldn't know that it wasn't intentional... only you and I know how it's supposed to go, so if you miss, you miss.  Don't worry!"

It worked.  She did great [smile]

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2girls

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Reply with quote  #12 
I can totally understand your concern. You are sweet to worry about her. I agree with others to please shield her from your concern about her messing up.

I will also say, at 6 years old (really any age) I would not worry if they mess up. Each dance is a learning opportunity. All that matters is they do their best and have fun. I would expect each of them will mess up at some point. 
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