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Lunafly

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Reply with quote  #1 
We've decided to switch studios. My DD is only 5 so it's not like this is going to be any big loss for them, but they do seem to really like her, so I'm sure they'll notice if we don't sign her up for the fall. Should I offer some sort of acknowledgement? There were no real specific issues, we just found a studio that I feel better suits our DD. How have you handled this?
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melissa745

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Reply with quote  #2 
No reason necessary. Not at that age. 

Have fun!
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tendumom

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Reply with quote  #3 
I agree with the others. No reason to say anything at that age. At 5, some take a break for a year or more to try other things. There are many reasons why a 5 yo might not come back to a studio. I can think of a handful who were at dd's former studio for a while as a little one who came back at various points in time down the road. It's all good. [smile]
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LJK2dance

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Reply with quote  #4 
I agree with the other posters that no formal notice is required.  If you are friendly with any of the moms, you could let them know your reasons for leaving while throwing in some praise for the former studio as to how much your DD liked it and how much you appreciate how nice they were to your DD.  That way, if your name ever comes up, there will be someone there to let the studio know that you didn't leave because you were unhappy, just that you found a program that was a better fit.  The dance world is a small one and there is no need to burn any bridges.  At only 5 yrs, though, I am confidant there will be no hard feelings!  Good luck with the new studio!!!

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Julieg

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Reply with quote  #5 
When my daughter decided to leave her studio of 10 years to go to a comp studio, I felt I owed the studio owners an explanation.  We had no problems with them and were leaving because my daughter really wanted to compete.  We didn't tell anyone besides her closest dance friend and just let people make the discovery on their own when classes started up in September.  I was worried that if a lot of kids found out there would be a mass exodus and would hurt the old studio.  I have no regrets on how we handled the situation.  When we bump into former teachers and classmates at conventions or out in the community we can hold our heads high and know we did it the right way.  There are other families at our current studio that chose to burn their bridges and it has made for very awkward situations at competitions and conventions.
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heidi459

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Reply with quote  #6 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Julieg
When my daughter decided to leave her studio of 10 years to go to a comp studio, I felt I owed the studio owners an explanation.  We had no problems with them and were leaving because my daughter really wanted to compete.  We didn't tell anyone besides her closest dance friend and just let people make the discovery on their own when classes started up in September.  I was worried that if a lot of kids found out there would be a mass exodus and would hurt the old studio.  I have no regrets on how we handled the situation.  When we bump into former teachers and classmates at conventions or out in the community we can hold our heads high and know we did it the right way.  There are other families at our current studio that chose to burn their bridges and it has made for very awkward situations at competitions and conventions.


Bridge burning is what you get when strong personalities sever a toxic relationship.  And while I wouldn't necessarily call it a good thing, it's not necessarily a bad thing either. What a lot of people don't seem to understand is that bridge burners generally have no desire to leave the door open & so rarely are there any regrets. And most have no problems holding their heads high.  BTDT [smile]

That said, I agree that at the OP's dd's age there's no need to say anything.  It's very likely no one will even think twice about it.
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My2DanceLoves

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Reply with quote  #7 
Quote:
Originally Posted by heidi459
Quote:
Originally Posted by Julieg
When my daughter decided to leave her studio of 10 years to go to a comp studio, I felt I owed the studio owners an explanation.  We had no problems with them and were leaving because my daughter really wanted to compete.  We didn't tell anyone besides her closest dance friend and just let people make the discovery on their own when classes started up in September.  I was worried that if a lot of kids found out there would be a mass exodus and would hurt the old studio.  I have no regrets on how we handled the situation.  When we bump into former teachers and classmates at conventions or out in the community we can hold our heads high and know we did it the right way.  There are other families at our current studio that chose to burn their bridges and it has made for very awkward situations at competitions and conventions.


Bridge burning is what you get when strong personalities sever a toxic relationships.  And while I wouldn't necessarily call it a good thing, it's not necessarily a bad thing either. People who are willing to burn a bridge generally have no desire leave the door open.  Believe me, most have no problems holding their heads high.  They rarely have any regrets.  BTDT [smile]

That said, I agree that at the OP's dd's age there's no need to say anything.  It's very likely no one will even think twice about it.


Yeah ,  I can certainly understand the wanting to offer an explanation thing , after 10 years , with no specific complaints.  But I don't think a 5 year old has any bridges to worry about it.  I say do what you are comfortable doing , but I think not saying anything would be fine.
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Curandera

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Reply with quote  #8 
There are a lot of variables:  (1) how long with studio; (2) age of student; (3) how important the dancer is to the studio or team if there is one and the resulting hole that may be left; (4) reason for leaving - animosity with studio owner, teacher, other parents, other students; (5) whether other studio is a competitor to the current studio, i.e. in the same vicinity, actually compete against each other, or following a beloved teacher who is leaving the current studio.

But generally, I would say, give some notice and reason for leaving if you believe (1) neither you nor your child will be mistreated, or punished subtly or overtly for leaving; (2) give your reason if it is not mean or vindictive like wanting to go to a competition studio when current studio does not compete or want to go to a pre-professional ballet school where there are more ballet intensive classes available; (3) if you and your child have been treated with respect and kindness, you should do the same.

It is true one should not burn any bridges if possible, but there are times when burning some bridges is best for all involved.  Some studios we gave notice, others we made sure dd tested and was accepted at another studio and gave written notice on the last day.  Dd did not tell any of her friends until the last day.  They all knew it was coming anyway.  Funny how the students knew, but the studio owner acted as if she did not.  She was horrible.  We didn't use bad language or raised voices.  We gave credit and compliments on the good to great aspects of her training but we also explained what faults existed that required the change.  We knew that would be burning bridges because the studio owner was arrogant and mean when she felt crossed.  Any kind of disagreement or objection was not welcome.  But that's okay.  We knew we would never cross back even if the bridge was undamaged.
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NYMomma205

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Reply with quote  #9 
Original poster, can I ask why you think the other studio will be a better fit? I'm still up in the air about switching current DD's studio, (she's around your daughters age) but I'm figuring at 4-5 years old, is anyone going to notice? I even have her registered there, but since there's no schedule of classes yet, I was just going to give a "the schedule wont' work for us." kind of answer if we do decide to switch...
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RainySun

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Reply with quote  #10 
We switched studios after 3 years when DD was 5 turning 6. There weren't any hard feelings towards the old studio, but we found a better fit for us. I did not give an explanation.

I remain facebook friends with the old SO and she has never brought it up.  It is well known that she takes issue with our current studio (long before we switched). There have been several long timers who have switched both before DD and after. Some of them had been there 10 years- they gave an explanation when leaving, but at 5 I didn't think I really needed to do so.
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Lunafly

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Reply with quote  #11 
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYMomma205
Original poster, can I ask why you think the other studio will be a better fit? I'm still up in the air about switching current DD's studio, (she's around your daughters age) but I'm figuring at 4-5 years old, is anyone going to notice? I even have her registered there, but since there's no schedule of classes yet, I was just going to give a "the schedule wont' work for us." kind of answer if we do decide to switch...


There were several reasons. First, our daughter is only 5 and the average age of the students at the studio seems to be in the 10-14 range. Because they have very few students her age available class times are limited. The quality of dance skill I'm seeing in the non-competition older dancers is very poor compared to other studios in our area, especially ballet. While most of the dance teachers have been dancing their whole lives, very few have formal dance education training. Despite all of this they're one of the most expensive studios in the area.

If we thought we were going to get into competitions I might consider staying at this studio as their competition team does well. But, my daughter is really only interested in ballet so next year we're trying a ballet school.

I figure now is the time to test out different places before she gets too heavily involved and switching becomes awkward. 
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heidi459

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Reply with quote  #12 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lunafly
There were several reasons. First, our daughter is only 5 and the average age of the students at the studio seems to be in the 10-14 range. Because they have very few students her age available class times are limited. The quality of dance skill I'm seeing in the non-competition older dancers is very poor compared to other studios in our area, especially ballet. While most of the dance teachers have been dancing their whole lives, very few have formal dance education training. Despite all of this they're one of the most expensive studios in the area.

If we thought we were going to get into competitions I might consider staying at this studio as their competition team does well. But, my daughter is really only interested in ballet so next year we're trying a ballet school.

I figure now is the time to test out different places before she gets too heavily involved and switching becomes awkward. 


I know this isn't a popular pov, but I always like to discourage people from thinking that switching is a negative...  from thinking that the goal should be to find something that will work for the long term. And I always say that because changing studios is often in a child's best interests... at one point, sometimes at multiple points, in their dance training.  And if you go in with this idea that switching is to be avoided, you sometimes end up doing your child a disservice.

I've tried really hard to teach my kids to embrace change from a very early age.  It's never easy, no, but that willingness to get out of their comfort zone... to not let fear of the unknown hold them back... can really serve them well throughout their lifetime.
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tendumom

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Reply with quote  #13 
So very true. 

I just posted a very long post about going back to see a recital at the school where dd began dance classes and spent her early years. Dd has made two studio switches, each for different reasons, each resulting in a very positive experience. 

I believe you should try to chose the right place for your child at the right time, recognizing that your needs (and wallet) and your child's needs can and will likely change. No different than anything else. The local piano teacher may be wonderful, but may not be capable of getting a very serious piano student to the next level. The local rec soccer team is right for a 7 yr old but when that 7 yr old turns into a talented, serious 14 yo player, the local rec team is not likely the right place for them. The school we picked for dd at 2.5 yrs (yes, that young) was a great place for her at the time. It was very interesting to see what would have been had the move not been made. The dancing was great, but it is not quite at the level where dd is today. 
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jlm645

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Reply with quote  #14 
Quote:
Originally Posted by heidi459
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lunafly
There were several reasons. First, our daughter is only 5 and the average age of the students at the studio seems to be in the 10-14 range. Because they have very few students her age available class times are limited. The quality of dance skill I'm seeing in the non-competition older dancers is very poor compared to other studios in our area, especially ballet. While most of the dance teachers have been dancing their whole lives, very few have formal dance education training. Despite all of this they're one of the most expensive studios in the area.

If we thought we were going to get into competitions I might consider staying at this studio as their competition team does well. But, my daughter is really only interested in ballet so next year we're trying a ballet school.

I figure now is the time to test out different places before she gets too heavily involved and switching becomes awkward. 


I know this isn't a popular pov, but I always like to discourage people from thinking that switching is a negative...  from thinking that the goal should be to find something that will work for the long term. And I always say that because changing studios is often in a child's best interests... at one point, sometimes at multiple points, in their dance training.  And if you go in with this idea that switching is to be avoided, you sometimes end up doing your child a disservice.

I've tried really hard to teach my kids to embrace change from a very early age.  It's never easy, no, but that willingness to get out of their comfort zone... to not let fear of the unknown hold them back... can really serve them well throughout their lifetime.


I consistently echo this approach.  It just isn't possible to know for sure what your child will need at 8, 12, 16 (and would you really want to?  Getting to watch and be a part of them figure those things out is one of the best parts!). And even if you could, there's no way to know that a year from now the studio you choose will be what it is now.  Or that they system they have that works for others will always work for you.  Find something you think will best meet your needs right now, and every year re-evaluate  if it is still meeting your needs.  

I don't see it as any different than that our daycare provider was absolutely wonderful, but could not meet her needs in kindergarten, and certainly can't teach her geometry now.  Outgrowing things is a part of life, and not necessarily a bad part. 
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Lunafly

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Reply with quote  #15 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jlm645
Quote:
Originally Posted by heidi459
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lunafly
There were several reasons. First, our daughter is only 5 and the average age of the students at the studio seems to be in the 10-14 range. Because they have very few students her age available class times are limited. The quality of dance skill I'm seeing in the non-competition older dancers is very poor compared to other studios in our area, especially ballet. While most of the dance teachers have been dancing their whole lives, very few have formal dance education training. Despite all of this they're one of the most expensive studios in the area.

If we thought we were going to get into competitions I might consider staying at this studio as their competition team does well. But, my daughter is really only interested in ballet so next year we're trying a ballet school.

I figure now is the time to test out different places before she gets too heavily involved and switching becomes awkward. 


I know this isn't a popular pov, but I always like to discourage people from thinking that switching is a negative...  from thinking that the goal should be to find something that will work for the long term. And I always say that because changing studios is often in a child's best interests... at one point, sometimes at multiple points, in their dance training.  And if you go in with this idea that switching is to be avoided, you sometimes end up doing your child a disservice.

I've tried really hard to teach my kids to embrace change from a very early age.  It's never easy, no, but that willingness to get out of their comfort zone... to not let fear of the unknown hold them back... can really serve them well throughout their lifetime.


I consistently echo this approach.  It just isn't possible to know for sure what your child will need at 8, 12, 16 (and would you really want to?  Getting to watch and be a part of them figure those things out is one of the best parts!). And even if you could, there's no way to know that a year from now the studio you choose will be what it is now.  Or that they system they have that works for others will always work for you.  Find something you think will best meet your needs right now, and every year re-evaluate  if it is still meeting your needs.  

I don't see it as any different than that our daycare provider was absolutely wonderful, but could not meet her needs in kindergarten, and certainly can't teach her geometry now.  Outgrowing things is a part of life, and not necessarily a bad part. 



I get what you're saying, but I also know that the competition dance teams in my area are as competitive with each other as high school football teams. So as she gets older I could see it being difficult to switch. From what I've heard from parents of older dancers, and even the studios themselves, is that it is generally not well received to have a student "studio-hopping" once they start competing. It's also one of the reasons I don't want her to do comp dancing anytime soon as I'm sure that once she settles in with a group of dancers and teachers that is where she'll want to stay.

Let's face it, even if we as their parents recognize that they should go elsewhere, at 9, 10, 11 years old they mostly care about being where their friends are. Sure, we can force them, but I'd rather try to get it right from the beginning if I can. Not just in dance, but any activity or even school. I'd rather try to find an environment that will suit them long term. Sure, nothing is 100%, but I'd like to give at least make a good effort at it.
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Berricre8v

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Reply with quote  #16 
As the office staffer that cold calls the non-returning students, I'd say a brief email would be appreciated.   Your "we're trying a studio that we think may be a better fit" is sufficient.

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NYMomma205

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Reply with quote  #17 
Studios do this? Just cuurious, do most people even answer the call? Personally, I feel like at such a young age, or if you've only been there like a year or 2, while nice, you really don't owe anyone an explaniation (sp). But I can understand wanting to if you've been there a long time or your kid was on a comp. team..
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tendumom

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Reply with quote  #18 
Dd's former studio did this sort of thing. There were always people who signed their kids up sometime after school started, instead of right away. I know they definitely sent out emails to those families and probably made calls as well. Those young kids are potential future dollars from a studio viewpoint. They need to keep those young ones coming in and a percentage of those need to stay to keep the school afloat. 
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heidi459

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Reply with quote  #19 
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYMomma205
Studios do this? Just cuurious, do most people even answer the call? Personally, I feel like at such a young age, or if you've only been there like a year or 2, while nice, you really don't owe anyone an explaniation (sp). But I can understand wanting to if you've been there a long time or your kid was on a comp. team..


A studio did that to me once... dd was 8, I think.  We were switching but didn't say anything.  They just called and asked if we were planning on registering because they hadn't heard from us yet.  They didn't ask for an explanation but,honestly, if they had I'd have been happy to have given them one.  It's smart for a studio owner to to be interested in finding out why their customers are leaving.
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